“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.“ – Martin Luther King Jr.
First of all happy new year from me to my lovely readers 🎉❤️.
Wow. What a year 2019 was.
I started last year in a confidence crippling relationship and I thought I was ending it with amazing friendships and a new job. 2019 hasn’t been kind to me all throughout but it’s taught me to be kind to myself and fight for the things I know I deserve. I didn’t do even half of the things I’d set out to do last year but I knew this would happen.
I won’t dwell so much on the horrible past and its pain but what I will say is that if you had a bad year last year it doesn’t mean that this year will also be a catastrophe. There are things that you just can’t control – you all already know that I don’t believe in wasting your energy on things that are beyond your power to fix. However, I’m going to share with you the multiple ways I am to make this year better than the last and maybe these will help you.
You need to ask yourself what exactly went wrong last year. List out what actually went wrong vs what you did wrong. We all make mistakes and that’s okay. But if you do not have the bravery to acknowledge your flaws and mistakes and check them – you’re never going to progress.
Once you’ve listed them out think (not obsess) about how you could’ve acted differently. Don’t linger on this task too much because focusing on the past will upset you – but just work out how you, as an individual, can be and do better.
2. Set goals and targets
Upon reflecting, you need to now set goals. Now don’t fall into the dumb mistake of listing 59 random things to achieve – that’s how you become depressed and start thinking you’re a failure for not achieving them. When setting goals – even if there are 59 of them – break them down into categories and timescales. I’ll insert and example (these aren’t all of my actual goals lol they’re just a few to show you what I mean).
As you can see, I’ve broken them down to physical goals, academic goals, career goals, social goals and emotional/mental goals. Within those categories I’ve broken them down further into long term, mid term and short term targets. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Don’t try to wake up as a billionaire 7 days into 2020. It’s not a thing. But break it down, plan your take over. Then go get it. Make your goals SMART.
And as much as it’s important to plan your career and academics – please make taking care of yourself, emotionally, mentally and physically, a goal. Those things are just as important as becoming a CEO.
3. Do something new
Listen – I started 2019 with the longest bucket list of things I needed to try. But after a few break downs and episodes of anxiety, I found myself not even being able to leave the house. Take it easy. Life isn’t a race. You do not have to try everything you’ve never done in this one year.
Maybe start with something small. If you’ve never been abroad – a quick weekend in Paris will solve that. If you’ve never been sky diving (and actually want to do that wypipo madness) – do it. It doesn’t have to be 50 new things but just do one or two amazing new things that you can look back at and be proud of. I’m doing a reading challenge – see Friday’s blog post xx
4. Be selfish and stop letting people take you for a mug
Are you a mug? No ask yourself for real because enough is enough. You are not an idiot, you are not worthless and you do not have to settle for less. Stop letting people bully you into becoming their bin bag? No because really are you a bin liner? Be selfish this year (this doesn’t mean be an absolute bastad). But take time to love and care for yourself. Before your friend comes to vent to you ask yourself – am I in a position where I can carry your burden and mine? It’s honestly okay to say “I’m not in the right frame of mind to talk about this right now, can we do this later?” It’s okay to not always be in the mood for people.
Sometimes you time is important. Take yourself out, get to know yourself. Shave, buy a new outfit, get your hair and nails done, spa day, new skin care routine, etc. Treat your body and mind with care. Put your needs first this year. Again this doesn’t mean being crappy to people. Still exercise love and empathy but not at the expense of self love and self care. Please let’s all behave and stick to gym…
5. GO FOR IT
Go for it. Start that YouTube channel. Start that podcast. Start that blog. Start your business. Open up your hair salon. Get back onto that course. Propose. Have children. Just go for the things that you want in life. You are so special and so talented and most of all you deserve love and happiness. If all your great ideas sit in your head then that’s all you risk becoming. “He had potential but…” ewwww yucky. Now again – do not be an idiot – plan well, take time, there’s no rush. But this year get the ball rolling . Even if all you do is spend twelve months developing an in depth business plan – that effective planning will help you when you do actually start your business. But do something towards achieving your dreams.
I threw in “propose” and “have children” sksksk because not everyone will drastically shake up the world. Not everyone wants to have a massive YouTube channel. Not everyone is creative and entrepreneurial. But I’ve learnt recently, that despite that challenges, marriage and kids are a beautiful thing. It’s the little things in life. If you have the opportunity to have love in your – true love not that toxic crap – then embrace it.
Conclusion – Well this is just the beginning…
In 2018 I said “2019 will not be my year but it’ll be the build up”. I treated it that way and I kind of regret not taking that space of time and using it to my advantage. My words were powerful and that year was really just a filler year. Your words are very very powerful. Speak positivity over this year and it’ll manifest.
I spent the first 6 days of the year planning my 2020. I now have 360 days (that breaks down into exactly 12 blocks of 30 days) to go and be great. Not being corny but this really is my year. So many great things on the way – can’t reveal too much yet but watch this space.
I really hope this is a happy new year for you. Above all I just want us to be okay. I want us all to win but to actually be emotionally and mentally okay as we’re conquering the world.
I love you for stepping into 2020 with me and appreciate you taking the time to read my blog. Again happy new year – go and slay the hell out of it 🎉🤝.